Plaintiff

After 15 years, my marriage was deteriorating more and more every day. My husband and I weren’t speaking anymore and we each have our own pastimes and circles of friends. We hardly do anything together anymore. We have even begun sleeping in different rooms. I finally realized that all that was keeping me from leaving was our son. I brought the subject up several times with my husband but nothing really changed. I went to spend two weeks with my sister to think and I came to the sad conclusion that it was time to put an end to this relationship.

I don’t know a lot about the law, which is why it seemed like a good idea for me to consult a lawyer before doing anything. I have confidence in the lawyer I met and he has been representing me throughout the process. First of all, he asked what my intentions were, went over the possibilities for reconciliation with my husband and talked about the things that I could do to come to an agreement with him about the consequences of the divorce.

I decided not to return home and to begin divorce proceedings. Because of the indifference that my husband showed every time I tried to talk to him about it, I gave my lawyer a mandate to serve him with a divorce application, so that he would understand that our relationship was finished as far as I was concerned. My husband reacted better than I expected; in fact, he recently told me that he found living together unbearable too..

Since the beginning of the proceedings, we have agreed to share time with our son, who was 10 years old at the time, equally. He would spend half his time at his father’s place and the other half with me in my new home.

On the recommendation of my lawyer, and knowing that my husband had agreed to it, I opted to use family mediation. With the help of the mediator and the advice of our respective lawyers, we came to an agreement on the financial consequences of our breakup, including the division of property. I sincerely believed that we could continue to share custody of our son, but then I got a surprise: my employer made me an offer that I had dreamed about for years – a job abroad, in a marvellous country and under great conditions.

I hesitated a great deal before accepting this offer, knowing that it would affect the custody arrangements for our son. I talked about it with my son and my lawyer. I weighed the pros and cons. I couldn’t pass it up and, after considering all of the factors carefully, I said yes.

I understand that my husband is very disappointed at the turn of events and that, for his part, our son is undecided: he wants to enjoy this exciting opportunity with me, but he also wants to stay with his father and would rather avoid having to move away from his friends. My husband is an excellent father but I am sure that my relationship with our son is much stronger…This makes sense, since I stayed at home for five years after his birth. I am worried about missing him too much if we are separated and he told me he has the same concern.

To avoid upsetting my son unnecessarily, I try not to ask him any questions. He has his own lawyer with whom he can be honest about his wishes and his worries. She seems to have carefully explained her role and what will happen in court to him. As a result, he doesn’t seem too worried about the prospect of appearing in court.

My lawyer also described to me in detail how the trial would unfold. I have spent several hours in her office preparing my testimony. We want to be sure that the judge understands my position and my arguments. I hope that the decision will come quickly because I have to leave in two months. The urgency of my situation is one of the elements that we will explain to the judge.

Deciding to seek a divorce is far from easy. To do so is to resolve to turn an important page in one’s life. All the same, when we have children we cannot make all these changes without thinking about their well-being and needs. I sincerely think that the new life waiting for us could make me and my son happy. Now we just have to convince the judge!